It has come to my attention that I am really weird. Ssshh. I can hear the sarcastic comments now. I know. I know. I am weird. I guess my discovery comes in the form of realizing that a lot of my bizarre quirks can be traced back to growing up on The Dark Continent. I think of things that normal Americans do not. I submit, for your consideration, evidence of my quirkiness.
Fruit. I love fruit. In fact, I am passionate about it … except one. Kiwi. I do not eat Kiwi. Why? Well, to be perfectly honest, Kiwi too closely resembles little hairy monkey balls. Yep. I said it. Little. Hairy. Monkey. Balls. The phrase was actually adopted from a grocery delivery driver while working at Shoney’s restaurant but once I had the visual … yeah – no more Kiwi. I have seen my fair share of real monkey balls in my lifetime and the resemblance is startling. It was not my favorite fruit anyway.
The power goes out. What do I do? I sit here. I figure it will come back on at some point … whenever. In the meantime? I have candles and books and peanut butter & jelly and … whatever. I am good. Hakuna Matata! My neighbor? Her first question is always, “Did somebody call the electric company?” Always! I never think about it. You live in Africa for a bit and you will not be calling the electric company every time the power goes off either. I think she has them on speed dial. (Love you, A.)
When washing dishes I stand like a Masai warrior leaning on his spear. That is, I put my left foot up on my knee and stand there … almost like a stork. I must find a picture to help you “see” what I am talking about. Hmmm. Let me see. Here you go:
I have stood like this while doing dishes since I was a kid. My mom used to ask me if I needed to go to the restroom, choo, loo, wc, toilet … you get the idea. No, mom. This is the way I stand – but only when I am washing dishes. (Thanks to Masai Environmental Resource Coalition. I stole their logo for my picture.)
There you go. Three examples of my quirky quirks. I told you I was weird.
“Quirky is sexy, like scars or chipped teeth.” ~Jennifer Aniston, American Actress