Bliss Beyond The Need For Approval
When you reach a personal goal … what do you do? Do you talk about it? Do you wait for people to notice? Do you take out a personal billboard on the highway as a blatant announcement to the rest of the planet? What?
“If you want to reach a state of bliss, then go beyond your ego and the internal dialogue. Make a decision to relinquish the need to control, the need to be approved, and the need to judge. Those are the three things the ego is doing all the time. It's very important to be aware of them every time they come up.” ~Deepak Chopra, Indian Physician & Author
I have this friend of who I am quite proud. I really am. She set a goal and she met that goal. Because of her success she looks absolutely fantastic, but I am tired of hearing about it. I’m tired of seeing more and more and more pictures of her.
Am I jealous? Yes. However, my irritation is not rooted in jealousy. It stems from my friend’s apparent need to do everything within his/her power to boost his/her own ego. We have both struggled with self-esteem … one of us, perhaps, more than the other but we each deal with those struggles in very different ways. I do not go looking for praise. It would appear that my friend can not stop the seemingly endless fishing expedition for more and more and more and more compliments.
“You are not what you were born, but what you have it in yourself to be.” ~Kingdom of Heaven, Film (2005)
If my friend (who, I believe, is one of my soul mates) should read this … know that I love you and, yes, I am proud and happy for you. I am also troubled by where you seem to be searching for your self worth. You are so much more then a shell of physical appearance.
“People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave. A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master...” ~Elizabeth Gilbert: eat, pray, love